


Match Made In Madam Puddifoots

by Queen_Cuntpunt



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Blind Date, Dating, Episode: s02e12 Army of Ghosts, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-10
Updated: 2018-06-10
Packaged: 2019-05-20 09:54:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,432
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14892395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Queen_Cuntpunt/pseuds/Queen_Cuntpunt
Summary: When Cornelius Fudge first signed up for the new dating service he never expected a match like this.





	Match Made In Madam Puddifoots

If being a disgraced minister taught Corneilous Fudge anything it was that sometimes you had to do things you would have never considered doing before. As such here he stood inside this garish joke of a restaurant, dressed in his best robes, a brooch designed to look like Devils snare the centerpiece of his look. Normally he wouldn't do anything so bold, but it really was the best way to find his date in the bustling crowd.

The little teashop was full, many witches and wizards mingling together searching for their dates. Clearly a great many of them had tried the same “Date-book” he had tried. An interesting hybrid of muggle dating, and magical methods. One simply took a page from the book and filled out all their information, and as soon as a match was found their page would instead turn to their dates time and location. So here he was, wearing the Devil Snare that had decorated his match-page, waiting.

Cornelious hoped that his date would notice him, because h didn't see any witches wearing anything reminiscent of the deadly plant. Surely his date wouldn't be so rude as to not follow the directions given to them when they signed up. There was no way he could match with someone that inconsiderate, the book guaranteed a perfect match.

A sudden arrival through the door grabbed his attention. A young man bursting through at top speeds, chestnut eyes wild and wide scanning the crowd. Clearly the young man had been late for his date. A snort of amusement escaped him at his concerned expression clearly expecting his date to not have waited for him. The amusement was short lived however when he noticed the squirming around the boys neck. His necktie wasn't actually some weird fashion choice it was alive. Thick black tendrils writhing about the boys throat. How the young lad could possibly not be afraid with Devil's snare around his neck Cornelious did not know. 

“You're wearing that?!” Cornelious asked loudly. Grabbing the lads attention. He looked startled for a moment, eyes darting across to Cornelius as though just realizing he was there. Eyes locking onto his brooch. “And, you're wearing that?” He asked shocked, stuttering over the words. It was then it clicked. This was his date, his foolish stupid date who showed up in actual Devils snare, and not just jewelery like any sane wizard would

Cornelius balked. Was his date even out of Hogwarts? He was still so young, fresh faced even if hardened by the recent war. He briefly wondered if his date had been at the battle, how much his inaction as minister had hurt him. The sudden spark of aggression in his eyes spoke volumes. 

“I was matched with YOU?” he asked, eyes sharp and focused. Cornelius took a step back arm gesturing to the table a few feet behind them. If he was already here he was at least going to get a tea and biscuit out of the situation. 

“Fortunately for you, you were matched with someone that both showed up on time and made a reservation.” Cornelius bit out. Going out in public had been rather difficult since the war, too many hostile civilians. He was used to anger, and he could respond in kind. 

To the boys credit he did sit down instead of storming off as Cornelius had expected. He took a moment to inspect the boy. He was lean and lanky, and there was a large scar running down the length of his left arm. His gaze was hard but he clearly had a face that was used to smiling. Large rough hands pushed his unruly hair back and Cornelius could see dirt beneath his nails. 

“Ok, something must be some kind of mistake, because there is no way I was actually matched with you!” Neville bit out. With a steady hand Cornelius held out the teapot filling a cup before him before reaching up and pouring a cup for his companion as well. Manners did matter after all even if his date severely lacked them.

“Well, I must agree. Clearly I couldn't possibly be matched with some child that would wear a deadly plant to his first date with his soul-mate.” Something shifted in the boy. 

“Deadly? Its Devils snare, its only deadly if your a first year that can't cast a simple lumos. This is just a sapling, just a sprout, it couldn't hurt me even if it wanted to. It has less chance of causing me harm than the average Minister of Magic.” 

“I beg your pardon?” 

“I'd say you were more deadly than most experiences in my life. Take into consideration that I fought in the battle of Hogwarts and Killed Voldemort's beloved pet.” Neville sassed. 

Cornelius was shocked at the bluntness of the lad before him. Years in the spotlight and very few people had ever been so open about their feelings for him. He has surrounded himself with yes-men, a large group of people that simply listened to what he said and always agreed. Yet here he was getting the what for from a young lad he just not recognized as Neville Longbottom. 

Maybe if he had surrounded himself with people like him, he could have been a better Minister. Maybe Voldemort would have never risen to power. Maybe he would have made more chances to the archaic laws that commanded the wizarding world. Maybe he could have left things a little better than when he started, or maybe just not left things in such worse shape. 

Neville tirade droned on, but he heard nothing, instead focusing on the young man before him. He was absolutely stunning when he was passionate, his eyes were brilliant, his voice sharp like a dagger. He was angry yet he didn't tremble the was many lesser men trembled with emotion. 

A flurry of yellow broke his focus and a young girl intruded at their table. Her golden hair only outdone by her flowing dress, decorative vines enchanted to gleam as bright as the sun. Her sudden tackle of a hug jostling the table the two untouched drinks sloshing out onto the table. 

“Neville so glad to see you!” Luna shouted out, holding him close. Suddenly Neville wasn't so angry. That aggressive passion he held replaced with a charming smile for the girl intruding on them. “I was so worried about my match, I am so relieved its someone I know! I was worried because of how many people think Devils snare is bad luck”

Cornelius frowned, confused, Neville had come in with devils snare just like him, and this girl wasn't even wearing anything resembling the plant. 

“What are you doing talking to the minister?” Luna asked, eyes flicking over ot finally acknowledge him. 

“You daft girl, he is my date!” Cornelius grunted out gesturing to the very carefully picked jewelery. 

“Why would Neville be your date? I received a devils snare, and he did as well. Unless maybe Devils snare is bad luck after all?” Luna droned off grabbing for one of the ignored cups and taking a slow sip. 

“Or, maybe there were two devils snare couples?” Neville added carefully. Much more polite now that a young witch was present. 

“Oh Neville I think you are right! Look over there, that woman is wearing a devil snare brooch too! It looks just like yours.” Luna commented gesturing towards the door.

He hadn't gotten a look at the woman before she had turned around but he didn't care much. Even going home dateless was better than playing third wheel for a young couple that clearly wanted nothing to do with him. Still he would try this witch first, it was a guaranteed match.

“Excuse me Ma’am, I believe you are looking for me?” He prompted politely upon reaching her. 

“Cornelius?!” The shrill voice of his wife filled the small restaurant. Oh no, what was she doing here? A quick glance down did prove the little blonde was honest about the brooch comment. 

For half a second he was grateful that his thoughts about his wife not being his perfect match were false, that he had signed up for this service for nothing and that he wasn't going out to cheat on his wife. Than he realized the only way his wife could possibly be here was if she had searched a new match too.

The smile dropped from his face as he met the angry eyes of his wife. Maybe that little blonde girl had been right about Devils Snare being a bad omen.

**Author's Note:**

> Quick story done for Dumbledores army on Facebook. I got the weird match, and I could not figure out any genuine way to get them to work.


End file.
